Most of you dream of having a good relationship with your children. You are probably doing your best to be the perfect parent. Various magazine articles, books, or websites tell you what the ideal parent is. You try to follow all these rules, but the result does not suit you.
Why is this happening? Psychologists can give a clear answer, and you may not like it.
You have come up with an image of ideal parents and are trying to match it by forgetting to enjoy parenting.
Psychologists assure that there are no ideal parents. You cannot take some advice and follow it. Your child is unique and requires a unique way of parenting. Therefore, only your experience can help you become a good parent. You must come to terms with your mistakes. Once, after numerous mistakes and tears, you will understand that an ideal mother is a happy mother. An exhausted and sad mother cannot give her child care and affection. In addition, the child does not feel safe with such a mother.
A happy mother is an example of a happy life for her child, who will be confident in his abilities and trust the world.
Too much worry about things like clothes, school, food, and so on takes away the mother’s time and energy. You are not a robot, and you cannot keep up with everything. If you’ve prepared a one-course light breakfast for your child, this is the norm. Waste of time cooking ten dishes will take away your energy, and you will not be able to communicate with your child.
Your kids can break toys, paint walls, throw things around. This does not mean that you are a bad mother. You cannot see and control everything. In addition, your task is to love and support your children in everything they think or want in life. Do not hinder them in their desire to know the world, even if they are panicky afraid of injuries and infections.
Your focus should be on your children. Although, some parents look only at the mistakes of their children and constantly tell them about them, hoping that it develops them.
Constant criticism from the dearest people makes a child insecure and withdrawn. Praise your children whenever possible, even for trying to do something. Your love and support are more important to children, and it makes them happy.
You are a living person with feelings and emotions. Therefore, your children should see how you can be sad and joyful. They must understand that it is right to experience different emotions. Many modern people are unable to express their emotions and hide them, which leads to a violation of their mental and emotional health. Be an example to your children and teach them about life.
If you want to be a truly happy mom, don’t try to portray yourself as the ideal mother and demonstrate it on every occasion. Yes, you can be both tired and irritable. But, your main task is to love your children in any situation.
If you are meeting the needs of your children and they often smile and laugh, then you are doing your job. Happy children are the result of perfect work.
Your kids will love you even if they haven’t cleaned the house or washed the dishes. Your children need you to feel comfortable and happy.
Psychologists urge you not to compare yourself to other parents. What you see is just the tip of the iceberg, and they also face problems. So live your life and enjoy your time with your kids.
You must always remember that children do not need an idea, they need a happy mother.