Every parent dreams about a trusting relationship with their children. Such relationships bring joy to the lives of parents and children. Also, children who trust their parents adapt to the outside world and copes with the problems that they meet on their way much better.
Trust is formed in early childhood and gives the child a sense of security. If a child is confident that he can talk about his feelings, experiences, fears, he gains self-confidence and grows up responsible and independent. Also, children who trust their parents, are caring and with personal safety boundaries. Unfortunately, most parents are faced with the fact that their children do not trust them. If you want to have a trusting relationship with your children, you should be patient and start building it from the first month of your child’s life.
Many psychologists argue that building a trusting relationship with a child takes place in several stages.
The first year of a child’s life.
During this period, the child is completely dependent on his parents. He comes into this world helpless and vulnerable. Caring for parents creates a sense of security in the child for life.
2 – 3 years.
At this age, the child is already more independent and begins to express his basic desires. At the same time, he is afraid of being left without a mother. Therefore, parents need to show their children that they are always there and ready to protect them from any danger.
4-5 years.
During this period, the child learns to express himself and show his skills. Therefore, parents should support the child’s aspirations to do something on their own. Thus, the child learns to trust himself. If at this moment the parents do not allow him to manifest, the child has doubts and he does not trust himself.
Many parents believe that these stages are unimportant and the child does not understand all these processes. However, all of it happens on a subconscious level. If parents ignore these steps, it will be difficult for them to build a trusting relationship with their child in the next stages of growing up.
As they grow older, the child continues to need the support of their parents. Therefore, there are a few rules to remember to help you build a trusting relationship with your adult child:
- minimum criticism;
- take time to talk to and listen to your child;
- support his initiative;
- take the side of the child in all situations;
- apologize to your child when you are wrong;
- maintain your child’s independence;
- respect the child’s privacy;
- show compassion and concern.
But the most important rule to help you have a good relationship with your children is love. Unconditional love gives your child unlimited confidence and a sense of security. As adults, such children are not afraid to experiment, say “no”, have personal boundaries, and respect the boundaries of other people. Love your children, spend time with them as much as possible, and be interested in their inner world. Money is very important to a child’s good standard of living, but it is not the key to happiness. You can give your child more than just money.
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