Unfortunately, no one pays due attention to education about relationships between people in the modern education system,. Teenagers getting into the adult world begin to interact based on their beliefs and ideas about the world. But often all these judgments are erroneous and aimed at destruction. In a world where information has become the most accessible resource, people get lost in such a variety and cannot separate the necessary from erroneous. In this way, attitudes have formed that guide you along your life path.
Relationships are the most important part of your life and misconceptions about them lead to psychological problems. People tend to idealize romantic relationships and when faced with real partners require unrealistic actions from them. They begin to claim from partner certain doings which can be unnatural for partners. Such a relationship is a path to unhappiness and depression. Therefore, we invite you to find out what toxic relationships are, and what they lead to. This knowledge will help you avoid or get out of toxic relationships.
Many people believe that love is the foundation of a relationship. They are ready to endure everything for this wonderful feeling and do not understand how they become dependent on toxic partners. Respect, trust, and affection should be the foundation of any relationship. These three whales on which the world of love stands. If one of the components disappears, then the world of love will collapse.
Some people justify physical and psychological abuse with love, but this is a toxic relationship that lacks respect. Such a relationship destroys you as a person, you lose energy and resources, and you cannot resist your offender.
In such a relationship, there is no intimacy because there is no trust. You cannot open up to your partner because you do not know how he/she will react to this, and whether he uses your feelings against you or not. Manipulators, cheaters, tyrants have skills that force you into toxic relationships. You will need a lot of effort and knowledge to free yourself from such relationships and start trusting people again.
People get into toxic relationships for a variety of reasons. Often this can be low self-esteem, a negative example of parents, a lack of understanding that the relationship can be different. Therefore, your mental state plays an important role in building healthy and happy relationships.
As a rule, people who are in toxic relationships do not see this as a problem and think that this is the norm of behavior that is inherent in all couples.
Psychologists name many signs of toxic relationships, but some of them are the most common and serious. If you notice at least one sign, it means that your relationship needs help. We do not urge you to end the relationship, it may be possible to save it, but for this, you need professional help.
Signs of a toxic relationship.
A reminder of your past.
If your partner constantly reproaches you for your past mistakes or relationships, then this is a sign of toxicity. This is your life and you decide how to live and what to do. Nobody can judge you. A loving partner accepts you with all your flaws and for him, the past does not matter. You may have made mistakes in the past, but this does not mean that you will continue to do so all the time. You probably realized your behavior, and you need to forgive yourself and forget about it. If you do not want to remember some moments of your life, then your partner should respect your choice. But, there is one caveat. If your past can concern the life of your current partner, he/she should know about it.
If you cannot accept something in your partner, then the situation will not change over time. Things will only get worse. Discuss everything with your partner at the beginning of the relationship and set personal boundaries.
The main problem of relationships with people is the lack of communication. You can avoid 99% of your problems if you learn to express your thoughts and emotions clearly. People can’t read each other’s minds, so if something annoys you, makes you angry, or tell your partner about it. He/she may not even know that his behavior is causing you such emotions. There is no need to take revenge on your partner, this will not help resolve the conflict, but will only aggravate the situation. You shouldn’t blame your partner, but just say how you feel when he does this. If your words don’t matter to him, then he/she is not interested in a relationship with you.
Constant comments and criticism in your address is a sign of toxic people. They usually think that they care about you and want to tell you how to live right. But if you are nor agree with him/her opinions, then you don’t need to listen to him/her. Criticism is especially toxic in the presence of other people, especially your family and friends. In this way, your partner is trying to show everyone that he/she is better than you. In this situation, words will not help, you need to learn to get out of this relationship until your self-esteem disappears completely.
Shifting responsibility for your emotions.
Each of us has some difficult days or times in our lives. During this period, you are likely to experience frustration, fatigue, or aggression. Perhaps you want special support from your partner or care that he/she doesn’t give because he/she is busy with his/her life. This behavior makes you angry or causes other non-promiscuous feelings, and you begin to blame your partner for the lack of understanding and support. You will be surprised, but the reason for this behavior of your partner is a lack of understanding of what is happening to you, and not his / her cruelty or callousness. Your partner is not responsible for having a bad day or having negative emotions. If you want to take care tell him/her about it.
Constantly monitoring phone calls, messages, and the location of your partner destroys your relationship. Jealousy is a sign of distrust and low self-esteem. If you think that your partner is cheating on you, then leave him, but do not be tormented by constant suspicions.